I’m a little behind. Though I feel light years ahead of time. I had’t quite anticipated how seismic an event this wedding would be. I knew it was probably gonna be the most excited and happy I’d been in my life, but witnessing so many dimensions of awesome, so many people who didn’t know each other before lovingly connecting, an overwhelming amount of incredible moments and time distorting to an extent that’s hard to grasp… It’s been a trip and I’m still processing. Here’s a snap from one of our guests.
So, apologies, I meant to write this from the beach in Oaxaca, but I was still busy digesting what had just hit me. And I’m somewhat glad I waited as a few exciting things were waiting for me when I got home. So, delayed but as usual, here are a few nuggets of what I’ve been reading, thinking about and what I’ve been working on. If anything resonates, make it swing! My doors are (almost) always open and I’d love to hear from you!
What I’m reading – Me and Gary Vee (yeah yeah yeah, Gary and I, I know, but it sounds better that way)
It’s a strange experience to read your own book with a cup of tea in the same place you read other books, not at a laptop constantly thinking about how to improve this or that sentence. This is it. It’s out on hard and paper back and on kindle on Amazon and in all major book stores. Many of you posted pictures as they’ve received their copy and I’m very grateful for all the messages! If you can spare a minute or five, a review on Amazon goes a really long way these days and will set the scene for a second edition down the line and the growth of existential coaching as a whole, so I’d really appreciate any kind words you can spare.
I’m also listening to Crushing It by Gary Vaynerchuck, which is an excellent insight into how to gain an audience online with lots of inspiring success stories.
What got me thinking – Going with the flow vs. Growth happens in a state of discomfort
This has been on my mind for quite some time and I’m sure you’ve heard from both camps before: Some tell you that “if you have to force yourself it’s not right for you. It needs to feel right in your gut. Trust your instinct. Follow your intuition!” The others tell you that “Growth happens in a state of discomfort. No pain, no gain. There’s no success without hard work and that the magic happens outside of your comfort zone.” I’ve had periods in my life during which I experienced each but generally find myself in the latter camp with very notable exceptions (consider flow states for example and how effortless peak performance can feel). While preparing for a recent talk on behaviour change at the Weekend University I revisited two videos from people I highly respect that really capture these two camps so I wanted to share them with you:
Bill Eckstrom – Why comfort will ruin your life
Alan Watts – The greatest skill of all
What I’m telling my kids #2:
There are these phrases that we gather from our parents, caregivers or any significant others which get repeated so often that they stick. When I started to think about having kids, lots of them popped back into my mind and I started to collect them and ask others for theirs, which gave birth to this segment. It’s also a great way to get to know someone on a different level and makes for really interesting conversation generally. Here’s another:
“It’s just a ride”
I might not tell them about Bill Hicks too early in life but the message is an important one in my opinion. A reminder not to take life too seriously, not to get too attached to things, and a reminder that you own your life and the decisions you make. It offers comfort when life hurts and keeps me humble when I’m flying high. It offers freedom and invites us to live in the present and to create our own meanings. Thanks Bill!
What’s out now – living to 120 documentary and my journey into existentialism
Very fresh off the video press and to be officially released tomorrow, in January I was visited by a film crew from Vice Media who had spent some time with the oldest man in the UK and asked me to provide a positive existential perspective on living to very very old age (fun fact: one of the experts they talked to proposed that the person to live to 200 has already been born!). It turned out to be a quit-smoking campaign but goes so much deeper than that. The film is up on YouTube already and you can check it out here!
Catch me live – Salisbury International Coaching Week
I’ve bee invited by the wonderful Ross Nichols to deliver two sessions for coaches and those interested in coaching as part of Salisbury International Coaching Week. Both are online and free in an effort to support coaching and coaches.
- 30 Apr, 19.30-21.00: Coaching for Happiness
- 03 May, 16.00-17.30: Crossing the line: how far can coaches go and whose line is it anyway?
And a quick reminder that you can still enroll in my Positive Psychology online course (with monthly live sessions each first Thursday of the month) using your special 25% subscribers discount. Just click [sorry only for subscribers of the mailing list] and study at your own pace.
As always, I’d love to hear what what you think and what you’d like to see me share in the future.